When “us” comes to an end
The world crumbles when a breakup becomes a shattering reality. All of a sudden the world appears like a dizzying blur, the only thing that becomes transparently clear is your heart breaking. Enough has been written and said about breakups. But the roadmap to healing is a maze of infinite turns, twists and splits into ways yet to be explored. So how do you deal with a wounded heart?
– One falls asleep crying, the other drops dead partying.
– One graciously forgives, the other plots a revenge.
– One retreats to a shell of forced isolation, paralyzed by the dreadful thought of facing the world; the other welcomes each day with a renewed hope of forging new friendships.
– One breaks down, the other is on the mend.
– One joins match.com, the other goes with lonely hearts.
– One drinks to forget, the other forgets to drink.
– One goes hiking, the other goes blogging.
– One hides the hurt, preferring instead to mask it with a straight face, a robotic smile and a monotoned “I’m perfectly fine!” response to anyone who cares to ask. The other openly bawls, as if on prompt, everytime a sad song plays on the radio; not that mellow music is being avoided, but is in fact purposely being sought out to boost the drama of the moment.
– One confides in no one. The other vents to a friend.
– One seeks comfort in solitude and meditation. The other is on an endless babble, campaigning to win sympathy and vindication.
And so many other permutations you could imagine for two people who have decided, either mutually or one-sidedly, that togetherness is just not going to be achieved with the both of them in the equation. Funny how our behavior foretells how intense the hurt is. The healing process could start with crying yourself to sleep at night. For others, moving on could mean getting a grip on being alone and loving it.
For the lucky ones, this is their nth breakup, so they know the drill. Like pro players, they are determined as ever to bounce back after a fall, eager to perfect their craft no matter how long it takes. Practice makes perfect.
As millions of exes will attest to, it is only a matter of TIME. Nursing a broken heart takes time. But healing will come. In time. At the right time. When it’s time. Healing takes time. It’s healed when it’s healed.